I don't know the answer. But there was JOY in the conversation today no matter how intimate, difficult, and challenging it was. It made a difference.

During the conversation we mainly talked about death in the third person perspective. We talked about the death of someone else but almost not about our own death. Life and death is the ultimate form of dualism. If you believe in non-duality then you don't believe in life and death. Who am I? Life is a process without a beginning and end, it's continuous and infinite. When an egg and a sperm cell interact something magical happens. A chain reaction is set in motion and something is growing, majuring, decaying, shrinking and disappearing. It's like a beautiful flower growing out of the roots of a bush, the flower doesn't try to be something it just is and it's interacting with its environment. With her colors and scent it is trying to manipulate her environment to make sure that she (life) remains part of the bigger picture of which she is an inseparable part. This process is applicable for all kinds of life forms, it's even applicable for the universe we perceive with our senses. The crux is that we (or most of us) believe that we are something separate, we think and believe that we have an inside and outside, We think that our body/mind complex is a boundary between the outside world and the inside world. This boundary is non-existent but very persistent. Every person has a unique perception of the so called 'outside' world and experiences an 'inside' world. I don't know (and I think that nobody knows) if a flower has consciousness. Does the flower experience an inside and outside world? I really don't know but we as human beings consciously experience an outside and inside world. This belief in a 'self' is so persistent that we believe in life and death. I said that "something is growing, majuring, decaying, shrinking and disappearing" but life itself will never disappear. We as a species might get instinct but life, the universe, will continue to evolve. Everything is interconnected and we as people can be aware of the non-duality of existence. If you see, from your own unique illusionary perspective, that everything happens all at once in this fleeting present moment then you will be able to see the joy of this moment and this moment and this moment... It's mysterious, beautiful and full of awe and wonder. If you embrace non-duality you automatically embrace all life forms and life in total. You will never hurt someone/something deliberately because you know that everything is connected. Once you transcend death (and life) you will experience the joyful experience of living in the present moment. Only the ego wants to control and is preventing us from seeing the bigger picture. During your conscious life you can transcend and bury the ego in your mind and heart. When the ego is mentally dead you will live in harmony with everything that 'surrounds you'. Death is an illusion, everything is ONE and it's a JOY.